The Honor Code at Home: Friendships

This summer at camp we introduced a new Honor Code, that actually wasn’t very new at all! You see, while having a structured, outlined Honor Code was new for us, it simply puts words to the Spirit of Greystone that has held true for 100 years. Greystone Girls have been following the Honor Code all along without even knowing it!

These qualities come naturally at camp, but we want to help you carry them home with you, and practice them in your communities all year long. Enter our Honor Code at Home series! We’ve already talked about how to live it out at school, and today we’re diving into a topic that we know our Greystone Girls care about: friendships.

Nothing will ever quite compare to your camp friends, but practicing the Honor Code in small ways in your school friendships can make them richer and fuller. Scroll on for a few of our ideas, but there are so many ways this can apply!

Showing Kindness

We’re starting with the most obvious one here. We don’t have to tell you that kindness is the foundation of all friendships! But what does it really look like to be kind in your friendships?

• Look outside of your typical group. One of the best part about friendships at camp is that anyone can be friends with anyone else! It doesn’t matter who you are or how different you might be. It’s only natural to gravitate towards people you are similar to, but show kindness by being the first one to iniate a friendship, even if it seems like you don’t have much in common at first.
• Be creative with love languages. Has anyone heard of the platinum rule? Treat others the way THEY want to be treated.. and this is where knowing your friends’ love languages can be so helpful! Find out if your friends like words, acts of service, quality time, or something totally different, and make sure you’re showing kindness to them in that particular way.
• Use technology to your advantage! We know, one of the best parts about camp friendships is that they are tech-free, but did you know your phone can actually help you be a better friend? Sarah Brown is the queen of this. Set reminders to help you remember important dates in your friends’ lives, and then check in with them, or send them a treat on a big day. Going the extra mile and showing that you remember them is what takes your friendships to a deeper, sweeter level.

Seeing the Good

Don’t we all want friends who are positive? Who see the best in us, and don’t give up on us when things are hard? Greystone Girls know that the best way to have friends like that is to BE that friend!

• Believe the best about people. In our world today, it can be so easy to write people off based on a rumor or something they said. Seeing the good in your friendships can look like believing that the people around you have positive intentions, and not immediately assuming the worst.
• Challenge your friends to talk positively and not gossip. This one is so hard, but can make such a huge positive difference in your friendships! It takes courage, but next time you’re with a group of friends and the gossiping starts, redirect the conversation or point out something good. Our words have power, and even just one person speaking the good can change a group!
• Reframe the way you think about your friendships at home. If you’re tempted to write them off because they’re not your camp friends, press pause and re-evaluate. No matter if you have a tight knit group of buddies, or feel like no one understands you, God has brought these people into your life intentionally, for your good and theirs. No matter what your friendships look like in this season, pray about them, and ask God to show you how to see the good in the people in your life.

Taking Ownership of What I Do

This part of the Honor Code can sometimes seem a little murky, but it can have a big impact on your friendships! Taking ownership means being accountable as a friend, recognizing that you have power and responsibility in your relationships. You can set the tone for your friendships, and that is a really cool thing.

• Understand that you are not perfect, and your friends won’t be either! Recognizing this allows you to have grace with others when they hurt you or let you down. Ultimately, Jesus is our perfect friend, and has welcomed and stood by us, which gives us the strength to do the same for others, without putting pressure on them to fulfill all our needs.
• Take a deep breath, and apologize when it’s warranted. Having friendships where you can ask for and receive forgiveness is a blessing. Practice saying sorry to your friends, and see how it feels to be forgiven by them, and your relationship to be restored. And when your friends ask for forgiveness? Offer it with abandon! Again, Jesus has forgiven us everything, so we can forgive others as well.
• Recognize that you can give any friendship the qualities of a camp friendship! Put your phones down when you’re together. Ask good questions. Pray together. Encourage each other to be your best and to grow. If there is something you feel like is missing in your friendships, be the one to change it!

The end of the Honor Code says “this is how I will have fun, make friends, and glorify God both in this place and in the world,” and that is so true. Doing these things consistently will solidify and stengthen your real-world friendships, and bring a little bit of that Greystone Bubble feeling to your life at home while you’re doing it.

There is so much more to this topic of friendships, so we want to hear from you too! What are ways that YOU show kindness, see the good, and take ownership at home? Comment below so we can share ideas together! Greystone Girls, we are proud of you. Keep praticing these lessons at home, and we’ll be back together before you know it!